I’ve been noticing …

that I don’t want to do much these days. I keep reading and hearing about all the projects that people are undertaking during their sheltering in place. Cleaning out their closets! Cleaning out their kitchen drawers! Writing that long-forgotten book! Shredding all the papers that piled up for months! I think I am going to stop reading about all the industrious things a person can do because although

I think it’s great to clean out your closet and kitchen drawers, not to mention write a book, I notice that I don’t have the impulse to be industrious or creative or to deep clean anything but my own mind. Which, because of so much time, can wander into familiar but painful territory. And this does feel like the time to face those scary stories and thoughts and emotions they evoke. Because here I am. Here we are. Without the usual distractions. But with a tremendous amount of grief for those we know who have lost so much. And with huge gratitude for the people who are risking so much by walking into hospitals every day.

If we are at home, if we are sheltering in place (like I am. I haven’t really been out of the house in four weeks), it doesn’t have to mean we become hyper-active and industrious. It could also be a time to rest. So many of us are so tired from the pace we keep normally. From what we even consider “normal.” Instead of whirling into action and creating new, better ways to be industrious and possibly, distract ourselves, we could also slow down. Question what drives us that doesn’t nourish us.

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